Chapter Seven

[theremedy]

Chapter Seven

Present:

Time keeps going by...

Nami wiped her red eyes with the offered handkerchief. She was fine. She was good. That was just an allergic reaction. Stress. Or something. She’d promised herself she was done with the crying thing, hadn’t she? This hadn’t been crying so it didn’t count.

“Is it too dusty in this room or is it just me?” she said to Usopp whose eyes were also suspiciously red.

“Pretty dusty. We should talk to someone about that,” he said shifting Luffy against his shoulder and looking away, blinking rapidly. Luffy didn’t even have the decency to look like he was sleeping. The milky light coming in from the window made him look washed out. Waxen. She stopped that train of thought in its tracks. Right now she had a job to do. She pulled Luffy’s head toward her, smoothing her fingers through the tangled mess before trimming it, catching the hairs between her fingers so that none would slide down his too bony neck and into his shirt. It was quiet work, nothing except the snip of the scissors and Usopp sniffing now and then. Nami didn’t look up. There was a whisper of shoes on the linoleum.

“Here are the linens,” Conis said in a soft voice. Nami felt the weight of the damn orchid, the tines seeming to dig into her scalp at the woman’s presence.

“Thanks,” Nami said, just to get her out. “We’ll take care of it.”

“You know her?” Usopp asked in a low voice after she’d left. Nami was silent as she trimmed the hair around Luffy’s left ear, concentrating mostly on deciding what to do with Usopp’s question.

“No, should I?” she finally said, looking up at him. He was watching her steadily. It was hard to fool a fool but she kept his gaze and raised her eyebrows. The truth was too complicated. The truth was too scary. If she could protect him from it, she’d do everything she could.

“What?” she said finally.

“Nothing.” He looked away. The great thing about Usopp sometimes was that he was just fine about being protected.

“Lift him up, will you?” Nami said, setting the scissors back on the cart. “I’ll change the sheets.”
Even though Luffy was much thinner than he used to be, Nami was surprised at how easily Usopp seemed to do it. He just pulled Luffy close to his chest and stood, Luffy’s head lolling against his shoulder, the tubes coiling down from him like small intestines. Nami tried not to think about that and stripped the bed. Careful not to get hair on the mattress. She remade it quickly enough and fluffed the pillows before she had Usopp set him back down again so that she could tuck the blanket around him. He so small and still with that haircut, his scar standing out vividly under his eye. He looked better with it long, she decided. Another thing she wished she could undo.

“You want to get out of here?” Usopp said and Nami nodded. He always did know when to get out. Still, she watched Luffy as Usopp gathered his things. She noted the slight weight of his head creasing the pillow, the painfully comforting rise of his chest.

“Let’s motor,” Usopp said and she stood, turning her back on Luffy and shutting the door behind her with a quiet click as she followed him out into the hall. Conis shot her a worried look from the reception desk and Nami touched the orchid in reply. She’d promised to meet with her tonight in exchange for Conis pretending they weren’t connected and without freaking out Usopp in the process—and so she’d keep that promise. She had to admit Conis was pretty good at keeping up a brave front when she was really a woman in trouble. Then again, anyone who was mixed up with Rob Lucci was in trouble in one way or another.

But never mind that for now. She turned her focus on Usopp who she hadn’t seen since last year when he’d only stayed long enough to pop in on the 24th, and then be off again, running away to hide in the bowels of Minnesota. Important projects, he’d said, and no one had believed him as no one ever did—but it was Usopp so they never said so. He didn’t look much different from then except for his hair being a little longer—but he’d definitely changed from when they’d first met.

He was much taller than her for one thing. Half a head instead of the few inches he had been. His shoulders were broader, too, and there was definite muscle there. It was more than subtle but not anywhere near the brick house in your face that was the great Roronoa Zoro. But one brick house was one enough for any group. Still it was strange to think that she really could hide behind his back now if she wanted to—as long as she could beat him to hiding behind hers.

“How is school?” Nami asked, slipping her arm around his for the added warmth as they crunched through the thin snow toward the bus shelter.

“Oh you know.” Usopp flipped a hand. “Schooly. But I’ve got tons of projects so—”

“They can wait,” Nami said, squeezing his arm in warning.

“Yeah, they can wait,” Usopp agreed. “I was going to say that.”

Sure, sure, Nami thought but didn’t say.

“What about you?” Usopp asked. “Still seeing that guy from IT?”

“What’s-his-name?” Nami said and Usopp made a face.

“I guess not, huh. Too bad, you seemed really great together.”

Really? Was he seriously saying that? Nami felt a pang she couldn’t ignore kick just under her ribcage.

“Usopp, we broke up two years ago,” she said. He winced.

“Oh, did you?”

“Yeah.”

“My bad.”

She snorted. ‘His bad’. He didn’t e-mail her or call her. Just avoided her once a year when they dragged him in to see his best friend. That was part of Usopp, too, as much as the lies and the artistic talent. He’d run away from anything if given the chance, no matter what he left behind. But he wasn’t the only one who was never around—and she wondered if it was going to be like that with everyone after—after this year. Drifting away like dandelion seeds in the wind. Going about their jobs. Their lives. Remembering a dream that had never managed to come about.

“Why’d you break up with him? I thought you really liked him,” Usopp said after a while, as if trying to make up the missing time. As if the reasons mattered now. Maybe they did. It wasn’t as if they had changed. Had she liked him? Yes. He was kind and sweet and funny and had a considerable amount of personal wealth—she couldn’t say that hadn’t been a factor since Luffy’s bills had been particularly exorbitant at the time. She really had liked him aside from that but… but what?

She was still chewing on it when they got to the bus shelter and hugged herself as a cold wind swept snow against her legs. She was wearing stockings, but a skirt was always a bad idea in this kind of weather. Usopp made an amused noise and she was tempted to bean him upside the head until he opened his coat.

“Want in?”

Not that it would do much good, but she couldn’t resist the offer. She leaned back against him, still hugging herself as he wrapped the coat back around them both. It wasn’t quite a hug so they didn’t have to acknowledge that. No comfort was being asked and none was being given. And since they weren’t facing each other, no amount of face composing needed to be done to prevent unnecessary emotion from leaking.

“Well?” Usopp asked. Well? Oh right. That guy.

“He wasn’t there,” Nami said, knowing that Usopp would know what she meant. He hadn’t been there on that long stretch of road. Hadn’t cheered himself hoarse at the arenas. Hadn’t visited caves, giant balls of yarn or restaurants shaped like dinosaurs. He hadn’t fought with them in Boulder or seen the ball drop in Time’s Square, all huddled together in a knot as snow and confetti tumbled together.

“That kind of restricts your prospects,” Usopp said with a chuckle. “I hear Franky’s free.”

“Don’t even talk to me about Franky,” Nami said. She still hadn’t quite forgiven him for making her jump out of her shoes that day.

“Why not? He’s pretty well off, isn’t he?”

Damn Usopp for knowing her type.

“His hair is too blue for my tastes.”

“Too bad. I’ll have to tell Vivi you aren’t interested,” Usopp said, nudging the top of her head with his chin. Nami clicked her tongue and playfully tapped at his jaw.

“Vivi doesn’t count. She’s a goddess and you know it.”

“I do. I watched her ascension myself on clouds of chiffon and designer shoes.”

“Classy.”

“Right?”

A few cars went by. A helicopter churred overhead, and some kids across the street, bundled up like little marshmallows pointed at it and called to their mother who stood and watched with them a while before hurrying them to the car.

“We should do this more often,” Nami said. She’d missed this. She missed him. She missed them all when they weren’t there but he’d always been the one she’d understood the most.

“We should,” Usopp said. She should let it go there. She knew she should. It would only be awkward again if she continued. But if she didn’t do it now…when would she? Another time? Would there be another time? Her bus was coming down the street, windshield wipers flickering. Nami let out a deep breath and stepped out of Usopp’s coat, back into the cold.

“We should,” she said, tugging it around him again and buttoning the upper most buttons while she looked into his eyes. “We’re still nakama no matter what. During Christmas. After Christmas. Maybe we can even go for broke and meet up on New Years.” Usopp’s smile was tight.

“I don’t know if I could handle such wild living.”

“Try it, you might like it,” she said, resting a hand briefly on the center of his chest.Her bus hissed to a stop. She gave him a parting smile before turning to get on.

“Hey,” Usopp said, and she looked back at him. “Sanji’s off tomorrow. You should come over for dinner. Maybe some games…”

“Sounds great,” Nami said, smile widening. “I’ll bring the schnapps.” Usopp grinned and shoved his hands in his pockets.

“I knew we could count on you.”

---
A few hours later and Nami found herself sitting in the little cafe attached to the hotel, stirring her coffee. Every time the door opened and she looked up to find someone else her stomach turned over. It wasn’t that she was afraid of Conis. The woman had seemed even more anxious than she was. But there was no telling who else might be watching.

‘Tread carefully,’ Robin had told her once. ‘Lucci does not work alone.’
But so far neither of them had been able to uncover who else he worked with. It could be Conis for all she knew, though her gut told her otherwise. She sipped at her coffee then checked her watch. Conis was late. Well if anything had happened to her there was little they could do. She felt a twinge of guilt for even thinking it since it wasn’t too too long ago where they’d flown to other states to rescue those far less innocent than Conis seemed to be. But that was then and this was now and Nami could only care for so much at a time. She told herself this. Layering on the excuses one by one, calcifying them inside of her so they would be as hard as bone.

Fifteen minutes later, Conis arrived, looking paler than her fluffy white coat and gripping a (kind of cute) harp shaped clutch. She must be going somewhere fancy, Nami decided and felt under dressed despite the fact she hadn’t changed since the Residence. She straightened her skirt anyway and waved Conis over. The woman blinked, looking apprehensive a moment before finally coming to join her.

“Want a drink?” Nami asked. “Coffee? Tea?” Whiskey?

“Oh, no thank you, I’m not staying long. You can help me, can’t you?” Conis looked down, biting her lip. “I’ve tried everything short of setting up land mines but I—”

“Hold on,” Nami said. Land mines? Was she serious? “Tell me what we’re up against first.”

“Right.” Conis straightened and told Nami about the resort that her father had inherited near Alma, Colorado. It had turned into a kind of family affair, almost a colony of relatives more than a resort. Things had been going well for sometime until a man named Enel arrived and took everything over and then—dark things began to happen. People disappearing. Some turning up again dead or worse. Stories Nami had heard more than once before from people sent by Lucci.

“And then…” Conis dug her fingers into her purse, tearing a hole with one long nail but not seeming to notice or care. “And then just last year Enel disappeared. We celebrated but—”

“He came back,” Nami said, because of course he had. “And he had some weird freaky ability.”
Conis nodded.

“Electricity…or something like it. I— he’s untouchable.”

“Is that so…” Nami said faintly, feeling the warmth rush from her body. What the hell was this? Why now of all times? No. It was too much. She felt bad for Conis she really did but they had a lot to deal with already. Their lives were ending. Why should they have to care about the lives of others? Conis looked up, as if reading her thoughts, her eyes blazing and glassy with unshed tears.

“We’ve tried everything. Even calling the police but nothing has been done. That man said you could help.”

He was mistaken, Nami wanted to say. No way in hell can we do this, she wanted to say.

“Leave me the info,” Nami said, voice sounding stronger than she expected it to be. “We’ll get back with you.”

Conis nodded and took a flash drive from her purse, sliding it over. Then she stood, clutching the bag.

“He said…he told me to tell you…remember what it’s for,” she said. Damn Lucci. Nami managed a faint smile somehow.

“I won’t forget,” she said, palming the flash drive. Conis gave her one last blazing look then seemed to mouth thank you before leaving the cafe, the door hissing shut behind her. She wouldn’t forget. But Lucci could forget it! Remember what it was for. Ha. Great one. What it was for was going to be dead soon so what did money matter any—

Oh god Lucci knew where Luffy was. The thought hit like a cold stone in the center of her chest. Had he made Conis say that as some sort of hint? A reminder? A threat? She felt sick.

Her phone vibrated making her jump. If that was Spandam she was going to throw it through the window. Unlisted… Nami unlocked her phone, telling her fingers to stop shaking like that damnit, and pressed talk.

“Well?” Lucci. She set her teeth.

“You threaten me and you just think I’m going to do what you want?” she said.

“It’s not a threat, it’s just a reminder,” Lucci said. “Long ago you had a question.”

If you know who did this, tell me! She remembered saying. On the verge of screaming at him. Wanting to find them so they could fix it. Or if they couldn’t fix it, so they could pay.

“And this guy is the answer,” Nami said.

“The closest we’ve found.”

Was it really? After five years had they finally gotten close? She didn’t know whether to trust him or not. He’d never lied to her but she’d always gotten the feeling that was because they always did what he wanted anyway. It was mutually beneficial, he’d said and she’d agreed— but now she couldn’t help but wonder…

“What’s your angle?”

“My own,” he said and hung up. Nami lowered the phone. Her fingers were burning and she uncurled them from the coffee cup, resting her hand palm upward on her lap as her heart thudded in her ears. She wasn’t expecting it would end in a miracle. What would happen would happen. But vengeance… Getting back at whoever had destroyed everything they’d built for themselves, their dreams, their sunny future hinging on a sunny smile that was slowly starving to death. That was something she could get behind. Nami swallowed. Adrenaline coursing through her now as she pressed four on speed-dial.

“Nami.” Zoro’s baritone sent a thrill through her, hot and cold and her stomach churned.

“We’ve got it,” she said. “Get up here.”


Past:

A little less conversation, a little more action


Nami bites the inside of her lip and watches the digital clock on the TV. 11:30. Midnight couldn’t come soon enough. Finally after two weeks of waiting, a furniture sale— New furniture, too, which meant rookies from all up and down the west coast. The perfect place for her annoying lunkhead of the hour to outshine the competition, and for the new lunkhead of the hour to make a splash. And even if it did end up with his blood on the mat, it is generally frowned on to kill in rookie challenges, so he’ll be fine. She has her notepad ready. Her pen. Her list of possible candidates. All she needs is for midnight to happen and registration to start.

“Do you mind?” asks her experienced lunkhead, plunking two twenty pound weights on the end of the bed. Nami shakes her head.

“Knock yourself out.”

He’s pumped and she can see it and that only makes the thrill even better.

“You guys wanna help?” Zoro says, glancing at Luffy and Usopp as he takes off his shirt. Well there is that advantage, too, Nami thinks with a faint grin trained at her notepad. The grin turns into a frown soon enough as Luffy crawls over her to get on the bed, nearly putting a knee in her gut.

“Get on on the other side!” she snaps. Like Usopp was doing. Why is he the only one with any kind of common sense in this outfit?

“Sorry sorry,” Luffy says with a grin that says he’s not sorry at all. Nami shoves his hat over his face and feels a little better about it before staring at the clock again. How can it still be 11:30?

“Here it’s all set up for you,” Usopp says, handing his Gameboy over. “Do you remember the controls?”

“Yeah I got ‘em,” Luffy says and Nami slides down to rest her head on the pillow beside Luffy to peer at the tiny screen and see what it is they’ve been doing all day. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Zoro crouch and feels the faint tremor as he fits his hands underneath the end of the bed and lifts it to chest height with no apparent effort. She absently wonders when she’s managed to get used to this sort of thing.

“What’s that one” she asks, pointing.

“Stingybutt,” Luffy answers.

“I keep telling you that’s a weedle,” Usopp says.

“Yeah but Stingybutt’s his name.”

“Only because you snuck it in there. I would have named him the Horn of Oblivion.”

“I don’t think that name will fit,” Nami says, tapping her pen against her lips and watching the match progress. It doesn’t seem too terribly complicated and she’s interested in spite of herself.

“Your Stinkybutt—” she starts.

“Stingybutt,” Luffy interjects with a frown.

“Horn of—”

“Whatever,” Nami says. “You should switch him out if you can or he’s going to die.”
Usopp scoots in closer, pushing his nose down a bit with a finger.

“Yeah you really should. Here,” he reaches for it. “Try…”

“No way!” Luffy says, holding the Gameboy away. “Stingybutt started this fight and he’s going to finish!”

“He’s got two HP,” Usopp says. “You’ll never make it.”

“He’s got determination!”

“Pixels don’t have power of determination, dummy,” Usopp says. “Except for this one— but nevermind that. Here let me just.”

“No.”

“Come on! I want to--”

“No!”

At each no, Luffy leans a little further over to keep the system from Usopp’s grasp until he’s practically on top of Nami. She rolls her eyes and plucks the Gameboy from his hands, shoving him back.

“Hey!” he snaps.

“As manager, I’m taking initiative and benching him,” Nami says. Luffy frowns fiercely at her, then nods.

“Okay. That’s fair.”

Zoro snorts. “Just try that in real life.”

They ignore him.

“So you’re up against a fire type,” Usopp says. “Use Blastoise. That’s the turtle thing.”

“I think I’ll use this cat thing.”

“You’ll die,” Usopp says.

“No I won’t. Here, Luffy, show me what to do.” He shows her what to do, even making suggestions while they try to fight the fire thing and completely ignore Usopp who is tutting and groaning and shaking his head in slow dramatic motion. After a short time the manage to succeed in completely mangling the cat thing. It’s really kind of nice, Nami thinks, despite the fact they’re losing. She hasn’t been physically close to someone like this since she was a kid when everything was still normal. Her and Nojiko would lie, pressed head to head, while they looked up at the stars painted on the ceiling and tell stories to one another.

Too much had gone since for that to happen again any time soon. Nojiko was too —well—grown up for that and anyway—she approved and she didn’t. They fought and stung at one another whenever Nami was home these days. Times that were fewer and far between.

“Damn,” Nami says, realizing her cat is dead and she’s not really been paying that much attention.

“It’s okay,” Luffy says. “You did your best.” And for a moment she thinks he means something else entirely. But it’s not that. There’s no way he could know. Usopp clears his throat and reaches over to gesture for the game. Nami hands it over and he frowns at them both down his long nose.

“You younglings have tried hard and come far, but the rest must be left up to the master.”

Nami picks up her notepad again, annoyed at the clock for only being 11:40 and she glowers at it. The bed rises and falls with Zoro’s ridiculous training and Usopp talks his way through a battle that’s probably 60% less exciting than he makes it out to be. She’s pretty sure the zombies are made up at least. It is, still nice in a weird way. But it’s not going to last. Nothing does. At most she can see herself being stuck with Zoro for a while, but he’s already gotten a reputation for being a broody swordsman. Those relationships either end with romantic entanglements, which, no thanks, or him brooding himself off into a sunset somewhere never to be seen again. Well he can do that the moment she has her ten grand.

As for herself, she’s only in this game long enough to get enough money to get the cure. She’d paid about 50 grand into it already. So there can’t be much left. 100 grand more. 200? And then…well…life will happen…she guesses. Somehow. GED if it’s not too late. College… Just like Nojiko and Bellemere wants…and wanted.

11:42. She taps her pencil against the paper. Move it, she thinks viciously at it. I have a job to do.

“I’ve explored nearly every region already,” Usopp’s voice filters into her conscious and she decides she might as well listen to him as she has nothing better to do. “Even the secret ones. This one time I—”

“Oh right,” Luffy says, sitting up and clapping his fist into his palm. Zoro lifts the bed just then and he slides back against the headboard but doesn’t lose the intense look on his face. Nami blinks up at him and looks at Usopp who shrugs.

“Oh right what?” Nami asks him.

“Did you remember something Luffy?” Usopp asks.

“Exploring. That’s a truth,” he says. Usopp makes the expression of something like ‘eh, maybe’ wavering his hand up and down in a ‘sort of’.

“A…truth?” Nami echoes. Was this some kind of…weird religious thing? She’d never much got religion but… Luffy nods. She waits for more. He doesn’t provide it.

“Anyone want to clue me in.”

“Luffy wants to find the truth to become the King of the World,” Usopp says. “But Luffy, just ‘exploring’ is a pretty weak truth.” Wait what?

“It’s not a weak truth,” Luffy says. No the strength of the truth is not the issue here. What kind of thing is that to say?

“It is a weak truth. Spice it up a bit. Say, daring explorer of the Swiss Alps or something.”

“Wait.” Nami held up a hand. “Can we stop the expedition for a second? Just what on earth are you talking about? King of the World?”

“It’s my ambition,” Luffy says with a grin. Nami props herself up on her elbows and stares at him.

“To rule the world.”

“No just to become King of it. Ruling is boring.”

…What was he twelve? She glances at Usopp to gauge his reaction but he’s sat up with Luffy and thumps him lightly on the arm with the back of his hand.

“But anyway, I’m telling you it needs to be more spicy.”

“It doesn’t need to be spicy at all. A truth is a truth like meat is on a bone.”

“That doesn’t even make any sense,” Usopp says.

“It does so.” Luffy folds his arm. “Meat is always on a bone, isn’t it?”

“Yeah except when it’s been deboned.”

“That’s different.”

“How is it different?”

“It’s not meat on a bone without a bone.”

“Listen, you’re making a circular argument here…”

Nami tunes out Tweedledum and Tweedledummer for a moment to cast a glance at Zoro who, even if he is a brooding navigational disaster, he’s a sane one. He doesn’t even seem to be paying attention and has shifted to squatting with the bed still braced on his hands. Nami tries to wrap her head around the surreal image of the room moving up and down but his head staying in a fixed spot. It’s like… Like…she can’t even think of something to compare it to. Never mind.

“Your brother is crazy, you know,” Nami says, hazarding a guess about their strange twisted relationship.

“Not my brother,” Zoro says.

“What then?”

“Captain.”

“…Captain.” Nami stares at him. He cannot be serious. That expression—he’s just pulling her leg. “Not King?” she says, trying to play along to tease out what must be a running gag.

“Well I’m not king yet,” Luffy says. “So captain is fine because I also want to be a pirate.”

“You’d need an eyepatch for that,” Usopp says. “And a peg leg, but back to meat on the bone…”

“I don’t, a pirate can look like whatever they want and they usually looked like the normal people around them anyway. Sometimes you couldn’t tell a pirate from everyone else.”

“So you want…to be a pirate King of the World?” Nami says before Usopp can take them off on some other loopy tangent.

“Yep.” Luffy grins. “What do you want to be?”

Nami blinks at him. Well— She’s always had answers for that question before depending on who was asking. Sometimes typical things like nurse and astronaut just to get the few adults that had asked her at that time— though lately the answer to the question is ‘I want to be watching the guy I bet on mopping the floor with the guy you bet on’. But being a bookie has never been one of her life goals. Nor being a manager, inasmuch as the prospect thrills her.

“I don’t…really know…”

“Okay. Where do you wanna go?”

“Venice,” Nami says. Because that’s always been set in stone ever since Bellemere first talked about it when they were little girls. “And Rome… Paris. London. Everywhere I can manage to get I suppose.”

“What would you do there?”

“Ride on those little scooters,” Usopp says. Nami hesitates. It sounds a little foolish if she says it out loud. Kind of a child’s dream. But…hell he wants to be pirate king of the world so she guesses she’s safe. If he laughs she’ll just bean him with the phone.

“Take pictures,” she says, suddenly remembering her old room before they’d had to move, the huge world map her and Nojiko and Bellemere had hung on the wall that nearly covered it from corner to corner. They’d put a thumbtack on every place they’d want to go. It had been their Grande Tour. Bellemere would take them to all the restaurants, Nojiko would do all the history research and Nami was the one supposed to take the pictures. She’d practiced, too, hard as she could and had probably gone through about a hundred disposable cameras before they’d run out of money.

“That’s it?” Usopp says and she wants to bean him instead.

“It doesn’t have to be more,” Luffy says. “It’s awesome just as it is. If I’m going to be pirate king of the world--”

“So it is pirate king now?” Usopp mutters.

“I’m going to need someone to take pictures of everything so I can become a legend.”

“I can probably make videos, too,” Nami says, sticking out her tongue.

“Hooh! You’re amazing!”

“I know,” Nami says with a dramatic hair flip, though she’s mostly just teasing. Taking pictures, or even video, isn’t all that hard.

“Haaaa I can’t wait,” Luffy says. “It’s going to be so amazing.”

“What, Venice?” Nami asks with a laugh. Luffy gives her a thousand watt smile that sends the breath right out of her lungs.

“Life.”

—

“I can’t do this,” Usopp says for the fifth time. “Oh god. I can’t do this. This is crazy.” He takes off the cowboy hat and thrusts it at her, hands shaking. Nami doesn’t blame him. This is one of the bigger arenas, even though it’s only a worthless competition except for exposure. Still the roar of the crowd and the blaze of the lights can be intimidating. Lord knows she’d never get up there. Also there was the whole being kidnapped in the last arena and shoved into a cage that he was, very verbally, worried about. Not that she blamed him at all. But she’d been gotten a pipe to the face and she was back and he was going to be to, even if she had to drag him kicking and screaming.

“You’ll be fine,” she says, taking the hat and jamming it back onto his head. It’s a different one from a different Good Will and Nami is already having second thoughts about the silver sequins. Well at least people will notice him.

“I won’t be fine. I’m going to die. I’ll have a heart attack. I’m prone to that condition, you know. In fact my can’t-be-an-MC-or-I’ll-die-horribly disease is kicking back up.” He clutches at his chest and sinks onto the bench. “Go on without me,” he coughs. “I’ll always…remember you…”

“Swear to God, Usopp, if you make me do it I’m going to charge you five hundred bucks a word.”

“I’m on the case!” Usopp shouts, shooting to his feet and saluting. A few people stop and stare but Nami ignores them.

“Good,” Nami says, knotting the bright yellow scarf around his neck. She hears a rattling sound and realizes his knees are knocking and shaking the bench behind them. No help for that, she guesses, letting it go. “You still have the index card right?”

His hands shoot to his pockets and he pulls out the crumpled card.

“Good. See? Just read off that and you’ll be fine.”

“Yeah but what if I get kidnapped again? I can’t handle that kind of thing twice. What if I really die this time?”

“Zoro said he’d take care of it,” Nami says, and while she’s not sure how or if he was even saying it to mean it or to be blindly reassuring, she’s not going to let Usopp in on her suspicions. “Just go out there and do your best. I’ll be up in C-22, okay?”

He swallows visibly and nods. She’s sure it’ll get easier for him once he’s done it once. Well, provided he doesn’t get horribly kidnapped again. But otherwise, he likes hearing the sound of his own voice enough that Nami can see this fitting him like a second skin.

“Yo, Usopp!” Luffy says. “You ready?”

“Luffy,” Nami says, turning toward the ‘pirate king of the world’ geeze. “You’re fifth ranking. You’re not going to be on for another hour and thirty WHY ARE YOU WEARING AN AFRO?!”

“It’s cool.” He fluffs it. “Zoro’s friend leant it to me.” He squishes it between his boxing gloves because of course he’s wearing boxing gloves in a meelee fight and who the hell had written ‘Future King of the World’ on his chest with bright red marker and she was going to kill whomever put him in those acid yellow shorts.

“Doesn’t he look awesome?” Usopp says, seemingly recovered as he wraps an arm around Luffy’s shoulders.

“Totally awesome!” Luffy says and they both give her thumbs up. Why did she agree to this again? What had the conversation been? This headache is familiar…

“There’s nothing awesome about it!” Except awesomely bad taste. But yelling was only going to make the headache worse and she pinches the bridge of her nose. “Take off that afro. You don’t know where it’s been. And put your regular clothes back on.”

“No way!” Luffy folds his arms. “I look cool!”

“Yeah he looks cool,” Usopp says, whipping a pair of cracked plastic shades out of his pocket and sliding them up his long nose. “Leave costuming to the experrrts sorry,” he trails off in a mutter as Nami glares at him with the force of a thousand suns.

“Wear what you want,” Nami says. “But this is your debut match. You’re not going to be fighting local boys any more but future rivals whose careers live and die by the pose they strike. Is this the pose you want? Is this how you want the world to see you?”

“No!” Luffy says, thrusting his fist into the air.

“Then go change.”

“Okay!” And he trots off, saying something like ‘hup hup hup’.

“Man, he’s weird,” says the long nosed liar in the sequined cowboy hat and cracked sunglasses.

“C-22,” Nami says to Usopp again. “Break a leg.” He nods, swallows and gives her the thumbs up before hurrying after Luffy. Nami watches him go, then takes a moment to check her makeup and outfit in the mirror. She doesn’t look like much of a manager, granted. She’s still wearing makeup over bruises not quite faded and her clothes, while flattering, are obviously careworn. At least she has heels. That gives her some flash.

Okay. She takes a deep breath and lets it out, reminding herself that her future career is on the line but if this doesn’t work out, she can always go back to being a bookie. Lifting her head she moves out into the arena proper, already swarming with thugs, talent agents and rich entrepreneurs who are hidden in two way mirror box seats dotted about the arena. Probably no one too rich. Not for this crowd. But maybe rich enough to float some extra cash her way if Zoro can put on a show—or Luffy can make them laugh hard enough—who knows?

“Well, well,” says a sharp bright voice behind her and Nami freezes in spite of herself. “Look at the little upstart. Deciding to specialize in failing as a manager now? Or are you working two jobs?”
Nami pivots. Valentine. The woman, looking irritatingly well put together, had seen her at her worst when she was just starting out and making bets when she had no idea what she was doing. Though mostly it had been Arlong who had no idea what he was doing and couldn’t come to the arenas to tell a strong fighter from a weak one. Not that she trusted his judgment any more. In any case, the only reason Valentine was mad at her now was because she’d taken the spot of top bookie twice from under the woman’s pointy little nose.

“I’ve graduated from taking other people’s money and have decided to make a little of my own. You should try it.”

“Sorry, I don’t have the time to be standing on street corners,” Valentine says, and the man beside her snickers.

“I wouldn’t think so what with that botched nose job,” Nami says.

“I never had a nose job!” Valentine says, coloring and Nami puts a hand to her chest.

“Oh, my sympathies.” And then she turns and walks away.

“You think you’ll get anywhere with that hick swordsman and whocares Loofah?! You’re nothing! You came from nothing and you’ll go back to nothing!”

A few months ago Nami would have risen to those words, flushing with anger. But a few months ago, she didn’t have Roronoa Zoro, who despite being a hick was already on the radar, even invited to this arena which was rare for rookies, even ones who’d excelled in the smaller arenas.

She finds her seat in the back against the wall and accepts a program from a nervous pink-haired kid with a basket full of them, then she takes her pen and notebook from her skirt pocket and checks out the set up and competition. This is a four specialty, four tier competition, otherwise known as the best kind. Martial arts, kickboxing, swordsmanship and melee. Too bad there is no slingshot class, though she’s yet to see Usopp’s ‘mad skills’.

She’s pleased to see Zoro at A rank, not surprising for a rookie of his caliber. First opponent, Cabaji. One of Buggy’s boys. He’s better than he looks, flashy and ridiculous, but deadly. She doubts if he’ll beat Zoro, though as she doubts he regularly bench presses beds. Nami rolls her eyes and highlights Zoro’s name and his fighting tier.

Luffy is at D rank for the melee fighters. Again, not surprising. First opponent is Kuromarimo. Huh. Nami flips back to the short blurb of the recognized fighters, annoyed that Zoro and Luffy didn’t have one prepared as the green haired lug should have known better— and sees that Kuromarimo fights for the Wapol Toy Company, which seems to be Canadian based. No wonder she’s never heard of them. She traces that fighting tier, too.

After a few minutes, the D matches start. Nami takes notes, watching for their strengths and weaknesses. Some of them are kind of pathetic, but others have potential. She’s definitely keeping an eye on that Koza guy. He seems to be an unhappy guy with intense ambition, something which will take him far. He wins his fight with a swift uppercut. The audiences cheer. Some boo. She circles his name and then moves down, heart jumping as she realizes it’s Luffy’s turn.

Oh hell. She swallows and looks up between the left and right platform until she sees the sequins of Usopp’s hat. Even from this distance he looks nervous as hell. Luffy, at least, has changed into his usual red vest and jean shorts, hat dangling against his back. She can’t read his expression well but wonders if he’s anxious. If he is, he’s not the only one.

Kuromarimo climbs down into the cage first, and Nami wants to facepalm as she sees him with an afro, weird matching boxing gloves that even look hairy, and a glittering cape. If Luffy gives her grief about this she’s going to beat him.

“Introducing, straight from the wild rugged Yukon countryside, Wapol’s only KUUUuuuurooOOMARIMO!” The crowd cheers and he poses, flexing his arms and Nami sees the faint gleam of metal at the man’s back as the cape swirls. Oh boy. Now it’s Usopp’s turn. Nami crosses her fingers. The silence is thick and he drops the mike, making people groan as a squeal goes through the room. Come on, Usopp, Nami thinks desperately. Just say introducing Monkey D. Luffy. That’s it. You can do it. Introducing Monkey D. Luffy.

He picks up the mike, and even Nami can see his hands shaking.

“I-i-introducing, st-straight fr-from…” Oh no… She watches Usopp blink and hears him murmur to Luffy.

“Where are you from?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Luffy answers in a low voice.

“Of course it matters just answer me.”

“Get off the platform!” says a sharp bright voice. Valentine. Nami clenches her hand into a fist. That bitch. The call is taken up, all around the room. Shut up, Nami snarls at him as she watches Usopp wilt. Shut up!

“SHUT UP!” Luffy bellows, his voice ringing to the rafters and buzzing the windows. There’s silence. Even Nami is shocked. After a moment, Luffy looks at Usopp and when the long nosed boy shakes his head, prods him with a finger.

“Monkey D. Luffy,” Usopp murmurs.

“Louder,” Luffy says.

“Monkey D. Luffy!” Usopp practically shrieks, causing a ripple of laughter. Oh geeze. Poor Usopp. Nami covers her face with one hand. She should have given him more prep work first. Luffy looks annoyed as he jumps down into the ring, landing in a crouch. Kuromarimo laughs at him, a great bellowing sound, carried by the acoustics of the place.

“Why not just have your nanny goat scream at us?” Kuromarimo says and Luffy takes two steps forward and punches him in the face just as the start bell rings. Nami smirks. Go get him! Kuromarimo stumbles back, blood spurting from his nose.

“Shut up,” Luffy snaps.

“I’ll shut you up!” the older man growls. He punches at Luffy who dodges and then dodges again and a third time. Nami leans forward, tapping her fingers against her chin. He’s really not bad. Luffy’s fist darts in, fast as a snake, and gets the guy right in the stomach so that he doubles over, stumbling back. Yes! It’s a boring fight thematically but Nami doesn’t care so long as this jerk’s ass gets kicked.

“You’re strong,” Kuromarimo says. Then points somewhere up in the stands. “Look! Tina Turner!”
As if anyone would fall for WHY IS HE LOOKING?! THAT IDIOT!

“Don’t fall for such easy tricks, you moron!” Nami snaps, forgetting herself.

“Sticky Glove Smash!” the man says, fist already in the arc that catches Luffy in the cheek as he turns to look back. Luffy is knocked back half a step. Kuromarimo’s fist slides back, but the glove stays stuck to Luffy’s cheek.

“Ew! What the hell? What did you stick to my face?!” Luffy says, trying to pull it off and scowling.
“Ugh it’s all hairy! Get it off!”

“Will you concentrate!” Nami shrieks at him as laughter erupts around the room. But it’s too late, while Luffy is trying to pull off the sticky hairball with both hands, Kuromarimo gets him with an under the chin hit calling it:

“Frostache Uppercut!”
“GAAAH!”

Nami buries her face in her hands as so she doesn’t have to watch him flailing around like a chicken with it’s head cut off. Laughter rolls through the arena like thunder. Nami peeks through her fingers and sees a particularly portly man a row down crying he’s laughing so hard. Well—at least he’ll be remembered.

“Now you’ll pay for your insult,” says Kuromarimo, whipping out a strange looking bazooka thing from behind his cape. It’s not a real bazooka since guns run the fun for everyone but Nami can’t help but feel a twinge of trepidation. Luffy is running at him, fist raised despite his…ridiculous attachments.

“AFRO BARRAGE!” Kuromarimo yells and pulls the trigger. Tiny afros explode from the barrel at rapid speed, knocking Luffy back and covering from head to toe as he flails around and tries to get them off, tripping and falling on the floor where…where oh lord. He’s stuck. Of course he is. Nami rests her forehead on her hand as the referee starts the count.

10…9…8…

Get up! Get up, moron!

“I’M NOT DONE! LET ME UP, YOU STUPID STICKY FROS!”

7…6…5…

He is not going to lose from those stupid things. Please tell her he’s not.

4…3…

Kuromarimo is already strutting. Nami holds her breath for a miracle. All he has to do is stand. That’s it!

“GRAAAAH!”

2…1…

“Kuromarimo wins!”

Nami tries to watch the referee, and then a team of referees try to unstick Luffy from the floor before burying her burning face in her hands again. She’s never going to live this down. Luffy is never going to live this down. Usopp is probably never going to get back up on the platform. The only one who will likely get out of this unscathed is Zoro— if he hasn’t quit them out of the sheer stupidity of that fight.

“Oh god,” Usopp says, and she peeks through her fingers to watch him settle beside her. He pulls the cowboy hat over his face. “I wanna die.”

“Tell me about it,” Nami says, but she looks up to see Luffy finally unstuck and being lead away in a sort of weird bow legged wobble by medics who keep laughing. She doesn’t blame them. She really doesn’t. Well she didn’t expect much better really and that is okay.

“I screwed up,” Usopp says.

“Yeah you did a bit,” Nami says, bumping her shoulder against his. “But everyone screws up their first time.”

“That badly?”

“Sometimes even worse,” Nami says with a rueful smile, taking his hat away from his face and setting it back on his head. He shakes his head and takes it off, shoving it under the seat instead. She doesn’t blame him. He rubs the back of his neck, face flushed.

“At least you got back okay,” she says.

“Yeah, no thanks to Zoro. Some creep followed me the whole way.”

“Maybe the creep was his friend?” Nami says hopefully, though with a sinking feeling as she wonders if it’s any creep she knows. She really does not want to be spotted here.

“Trust me, that guy is not any friend of Zoro’s.” Usopp slouches quickly in his seat, splaying a hand over his face as if trying to hide it. “Oh god, he’s coming this way.”

Nami looks in the direction of said creep—and agrees with Usopp completely. A man, tall and lanky, wearing a spangly top, matching spangle and tulle skirt, full make-up and, Nami has to admit, killer heels. He’s coming this way, too. Eying the empty seat.

“Quick put my hat there,” Usopp hisses but Nami waves him off. This is not the place to insult anyone even if they did look… special.

“Ah, what a fight,” the man says, sitting next to them and primly folding one leg over the other. Then he looks at them and bats his eyelashes, or would if he had any. Why not apply eyelashes if you were going that far? “Who am I? What am I?” he says, resting spangly long nails against his collar bone. “I’m so glad you asked!”

“We didn’t,” Nami and Usopp say at the same time, waving their hands.

“I am called Bon Clay or Bon-chan or Bon Bon. The face of a man and the heart of a woman.” He crossed his legs the other way. “Because it’s only when we cross the threshold of gender that we experience the true pleasures of life. As both and either I understand everything! Sometimes when my heart sings warm I cross to the left, sometimes when it sings cool I cross to the right. I can cross anyway I want, but always the cross-dresser way! Let that be a lesson,” he says, circling his pinky around his glittery red lips. “Lesson.”

“If someone starts singing Timewarp, I’m out of here,” Usopp mutters. Nami will be right behind him.

“You must be Nami,” Bon Clay says, holding out a (somewhat surprisingly) strong hand to shake. Nami takes it because making friends is good. “ZoZo told me about you.”

“ZoZo?” Usopp says, sounding weak and once again mirroring Nami’s thoughts exactly.

“You’re um, ZoZ…Zoro’s friend?” Nami says with a tight smile.

“Mm. I was his first…”

What?

“…opponent on the circuit,” Bon Clay says and Nami lets out a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding.

“Of course it was all melee then, but swords versus my lovelies?” And here he lifts a hairy leg. Why hairy. Just why? He crosses his legs the other way. “The competition was tight, but alas, I was beaten.”

“Oh…” Nami says, because what else can anyone really say to something like that?

The next specialty is up and they fall silent as the fighters are announced, the MCs bellowing the names through the air and Nami watches Usopp shrink and shrink, tucking his hands deeper and deeper into his pockets.She wishes there was something she could tell him. It would have helped even a little if Luffy had won the fight but…

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Usoso,” Bon Clay says. “I’m willing to bet none of these chickadees have ever seen an announcement like that one.”

“Yeah cuz it was stupid as hell,” Usopp mutters.

“Hmmm noo. It was weak to be sure, but your fighter believed in you and that’s rare.”

“Believed in me?” Usopp straightened.

“Of course! It is there for anyone to see if they knew where to look!”

“Well you know I am the best MC there is,” Usopp says, pushing himself straight. “I was just trying to make him look better. You know. Show off what a straightforward guy he really is. I’m really proud of him.”

Nami smiles and is not quite sure that she catches Bon Clay wink. Either way, she decides, she likes him just a little bit more.

The other fights were hit or miss. Nami ended up switching seats with Bon Clay so he and Usopp could chat like old washer women while Nami payed attention to the fights. She is only somewhat relieved to find that there is a ‘losers’ round where Luffy will have another chance to fight against some sort of mystery champion. But before that is A ranked swords.

The house lights are dimmed for this and different lights flick onto the arena floor, like in most A ranks. Rookies or not, this is where the money is, where the best entrances are. Though as there are mostly rookies, most entrances are MC announced with a few props. There is this one really neat guy with pink paper designed to look like petals. Nami makes a note of this. And then it is Zoro’s fight. On the left platform is the MC for Cabaji, a scrawny guy with a little clown hat. Must be new.

“From the Buggy Boys, scourge of the arena, death to all who dare oppose, second in strength only to his amazingly flashy Captain whose power only grows”

“WHO HAS A BIG RED NOSE?!” screeches Buggy predictably from somewhere in the arena.

“Cabaji,” the scrawny guy yelps and dives off the platform, just missing being impaled by a flurry of throwing knives. Circus music sounds, fast and sinister and the lights dim as Cabaji rides off the platform on a unicycle, flips elegantly in the air and lands, unsheathing his sword as he does so.
The crowd cheers and Nami can’t help but clap. That is kind of impressive. She wonders what Zoro has cooked up. Then realizes with a sinking feeling he’s probably cooked nothing up. It’s going to be as silent as the grave. But—well-first runs are always bad so it’s to be expected and she won’t let it get to her.

The circus music fades. It's still dark so that she can barely see the platforms. She sees Zoro, darker against the black and can hear his footfalls against the metal of the platform and then he jumps down, landing in a crouch before standing, eyes dark under the green bandanna wrapped around his head, one hand resting on his swords, his earrings gleaming.

The next sound is the clash of steel and Nami realizes she’s on the edge of her seat, watching the two swordsmen go at each other. Cabaji throws meaningless taunts but stops as Zoro refuses to answer them, using a sword in each hand as he meets each of Cabaji’s blows, driving and leading him around the ring. Then Cabaji seems to gain ground, snarling and riding his unicycle around the cage’s walls, then pushing off and falling at Zoro, light glinting over the blade. Zoro doesn’t seem to want to move for it, staring up at Cadaji with a narrowed expression.

“Come on,” Usopp whispers. “Come on, Zoro.”

Nami presses her knuckles to her lips.

Then Zoro moves, trapping Cabaji’s blade between both of his own and twisting it, knocking the cyclist off balance and sending him crashing to the mat. The blade itself sheers off and Zoro’s blades are crossed like scissors over Cabaji’s neck. They stare at one another. After a hesitant moment the count starts. A throwing knife swipps out of the darkness and lands, quivering, by Cabaji’s hand.

“Go die!” Cabaji snaps, grabbing the dagger and slamming it into Zoro’s side. Shit! He gagged and dropped to one knee, blood splashing onto the white mat.

“Oi!” That was Usopp’s voice and he was surging to his feet. “That’s cheating, you jerk!”

“That’s the game,” Buggy’s voice comes floating sharp across the otherwise quiet arena. “And it looks like you losers lost! Dahahahaha!” And then in a tone that made Nami shiver. “Finish him.”

“Finish him,” someone else said and soon the whole arena was chanting it. In the darkness, Nami could see Usopp look at her frantically. He wanted to do something. But what could they do short of bursting into the arena itself? Cabaji grinned and darted at Zoro.

“Prepare for the end!” the cyclist howled.

“Please.” Zoro moved almost faster than she could follow, hitting him in the face with the blunt side of the blade and sending Cabaji hurtling across the stage, hitting the chain fence so hard that a chain on the top snapped and sent one corner of the stage listing into the crowd. Cabaji rolled off the cage onto the mat, and was still for ten counts.

“Don’t think a little cut constitutes a win,” Zoro says in the ensuing silence, sheathing two swords at once, pulling out the dagger with a grunt and sending it spinning it out onto the mat, splattering blood where it went. “It’ll take more than piss poor ambition to bring me down.”

There was ragged uneven applause at the win and Nami sits back, watching somewhat worried as Zoro climbs the ladder despite leaking blood everywhere and disappears into the darkness.

“Man I thought I was going to die,” Usopp says, flopping back into his seat.

“You get used to that with ZoZo,” Bon Clay says, absently patting Usopp’s knee.

“I have to get used to this?” Usopp says with a groan. The lights flicker back on Nami sits back, letting out a long breath. That was intense. Zoro’s really going to carry her far. His entrance is stark in a good way but it can use a little touch of something… She can’t think of what.

“Well that’s half time, my dears,” Bon Clay says, sitting back and fanning himself with his hand and then pulling his own program out of his…shirt? To check off something. “ZoZo hasn’t let me down yet. Such is the intense power of our love.”

“I don’t think that has anything to do with it,” Usopp says, once again the voice for the audience that is Nami. How could she have lived without him here? Honestly. “I’m going to get a drink,” Usopp says, pointing to the nervous pink haired kid who is selling sodas by the bottle below.

“Get me one, too,” says Nami, pulling a twenty from her bra and handing it over to him. He looks at it hesitantly and she sighs.

“Yes, it has boob on it. Get over it.” And she shakes the bill at him.

“Right…” And as he gingerly takes it from her fingers. “Want one Bon-chan?”

So it was ‘chan’ now? And why was he offering with her—their money to begin with?

“Oh no! I couldn’t!” he shakes his head, putting the sparkly nails near his aggressive jaw line before flicking his hands out. “Soda gives me gas.”

Wow. This guy. Usopp seems unbothered by this statement, though and hurries down. Nami keeps an eagle eye on him, just in case someone does try to sweep him away, though Bon Clay’s blue and gold platform stilettos keep catching her eye.

“Those are gorgeous,” Nami says.

“Aren’t they? They put me back three fights, but how could I live without them? The nest says past.”

“…Huh?”

“French, of course.”

“…Of course.” She leans back, crossing her legs at the knee and making a face at the worn heels she’s wearing. She had a much better pair in her luggage. Her burned luggage. What had convinced her to leave it there other than being too cheap for a hotel? There had to be someone to blame! Oh right…the idiots she is traveling with. But…thinking of that place….

“So you’ve been around for a while…awhile on the circuit I mean because you’re so strong,” Nami adds hurriedly to head off Bon Clay’s insulted look.

“For a short while, yes. After all I’m still in the fresh blossom of youth.”
Maybe twenty blossoms ago. Nami holds that comment behind her teeth and leans toward the cross-dresser, pitching her voice low.

“Do you know anything about people getting kidnapped from arenas?”

“Well I’ve certainly heard rumors. But hasn’t everyone?” Bon Clay says, resting his chin on the backs of his fingers. “They say it’s mostly in the out of the way places with people that don’t matter.”
Nami bristles. She was one of those people after all! But Bon Clay is their protector so she settles again and only thinks acid thoughts at him.

“Do they say Foxy is involved? And why it’s happening?”

“They say everyone is involved, but Foxy is definitely suspect. Well you know he’s always been involved in that sort of thing.” Bon Clay flaps his hand and sits back. “It was human trafficking for a while and half of his stable are undocumented immigrants. It’s why he stays on the bottom tier, they say. As for why” He shrugs with surprising elegance. “Traffiking? Press ganging? Selling them for horrific scientific experiments? Who really knows?”

“Right…” Nami says, remembering the huge leopard man. So inhuman. Not quite as inhuman as Arlong but—still startling to see another of that kind of thing. A new species of that kind of thing. Was that what had been going to happen to her?

“Anyway, I’m not asking because I’m not caring. A man with the flowering pearlescent heart of a woman does not make it to Vegas if he asks too many questions from his perfectly shaped lips. The boss doesn’t like it.”

“The boss?”

“Of Las Vegas, darling. A cross-dressers paradise lost! The floor shows! The lights! The sequins! The passion! A man must cross down many roads to find that he is a man and a woman must cross down many to find that she is a woman, and though a cross-dresser has to cross down twice as many, all roads lead to the glimmering lights that is the glory of Las Ve Gas! Nnn!”
Was the ‘nnn’ really necessary? Still that doesn’t tell her much more than she’s already found out on her own with her short time with Foxy. She’s glad she found that out, too, before she’d gotten her hands that dirty.

“Are you going to take this or not?” Usopp says and Nami blinks at him holding out a sweating cup of coke.

“Oh I forgot you were here.”

“What do you mean you forgot?!” Usopp says seeming to swell up. “I could have been kidnapped!”

“So what’s this about a loser’s round?” Nami asks Bon Clay, sipping at her coke.

“OI! Don’t just ignore me!”

“Is Zoro going to have to fight again?” The last two battles she’d seen blood spotting under his shirt above the bellywarmer and, among other things, doesn’t want to lose her cash cow this early in the game.

“Well the championship bout for his specialty, of course. But usually the loser’s round is fought only in the melee specialty. Because the other three are more ‘legitimate’ and melee is just thrashing around and fancy weapons, you know? But what it is, the worst loser goes up against the melee champion at a chance for a rousing improbable win or another abject humiliation.”

“Oh man that sounds awful,” Usopp says.

“It usually is. Can I have a sip of coke?”

“What?! No way!”

“MMmm. So harsh, Usoso!”

“Hush, they’re announcing the winner.” Or loser. Or selection. Whatever. There is a drum roll and everything and Nami feels both thrilled and doomed as Luffy’s name flashes up on the screens, accompanied by a comedic trombone sound. Well ‘Manky D Loofah’ was the name that appeared, Valentine’s doing no doubt. Nami will show her up with Zoro somehow. She will end that woman.

“Does that mean the MC will have to go up again?” Usopp asks, his voice flat. He is staring at the blazing yellow letters of Luffy’s name, frowning.

“Usually,” Bon Clay says.

“Look, Usopp, you don’t have to—”

“No,” Usopp says, cutting a glance at her. “I owe Luffy more than that.”

Nami isn’t sure how he owes Luffy anything but the look in his eyes is intense and Nami doesn’t argue the point. Who is this and what has he done with the little kid that was freaking out not a few hours ago. Usopp stands, looking tall against the light.

“Bon-chan, can you help me out?”

“It would be my pleasure, mon ami,” Bon Clay says, standing and throwing Nami another wink. Please don’t mess up, Nami thinks. She couldn’t bear to watch it. The rest of the fights go by and Nami is too anxious to pay attention much.

Though she does watch Zoro’s bout with some guy who looked strong in the opening but, in reality, relied entirely too much on flashly stunts and is beaten in the first two minutes. The crowd doesn’t like that. Which is the problem. They probably admire his skill, who wouldn’t? But unless someone is a swordsman it’s hard to be entertained by it. Not to mention he wins with a somber expression and leaves the stage with a somber expression and a cash prize that Nami will have to pry from his sausage fingers. Would it kill him to smile once in a while?

And then…the loser’s bout. Bon Clay comes back before it begins and when Nami looks at him, he only smiles and shakes his head. She fiddles with her program as she watches Kuromarimo climb back down into the arena, his cape wrapped all around him now and considerably taller than he was before.

“You’ve seen him fight, you’ve seen him win, he’s made even taller by the fear of his victims! The one. The only KUuuROOMARIMOOO!” And he shrugs off his cape to reveal the same outfit as before only with sequined platformed boots.

“How tacky,” Bon Clay says and Nami has no choice but to agree with him. But it’s Usopp’s turn and her throat is closed up, her heart throbbing in her ears. The arena goes pitch black and several surprised noises rise up from the crowd. Almost immediately, with a metallic ‘chung’ a spotlight flicks on, coming from behind Usopp, bathing him in silhouette and casting an oval of light on the arena from the medic’s gate to just including Kuromarimo. Even with Usopp’s long nose, Nami can only admire the effect.

“They say it’s not how a man is beaten that counts,” Usopp says, his voice low and somber. “But how he rises again, a phoenix from the ashes.”

A fan starts somewhere behind him, sending a soft shower of left over plastic petals arching to fall on the arena. The medics gate opens from the outside and she is mildly surprised to see it looks like Zoro who has opened it.

“I present to you,” Usopp says. “Future Pirate King of the World…”

“What did he say?” someone whispered, and so did someone else, all around her it seemed, like nervous sheets of paper.

“Monkey D. Luffy.”

“Holy shit,” someone breathes, and Nami is inclined to agree with them.

Luffy comes into the circle of the light, vest undone and being tossed lightly by the swirling gust of the fan, straw hat thumping against his back, face low and serious as petals drift around him. There is a beat of silence. A thousand breaths waiting. Then Luffy grins, quick and hard, slamming his fist into his palm.

“I’m going to kick your ass.”

“What?” says Kuromarimo.

Ding!

And Luffy is off, bolting forward, one, two, three punches to the face, and pivoting to whip a kick at his head from the side, sending Kuromarimo crashing into the fencing. The audience cheers and Nami realizes she’s grinning so hard it hurts.

“You bastard,” Kuromarimo snaps, then charges, fist drawn back. “Sticky glove—” Luffy slips out of the way of his fist, grabs it and throws him, sending him crashing into the fencing again.

“Don’t use the same stupid trick on me twice,” Luffy says.


“You can count on dying for that,” says Kuromarimo, wiping blood from his lip

“There’s no way someone like you can kill me.”

“You think so? DOUBLE FRO BARRAGE!” And he flings back his cape, two bazookas this time but as the fros come spiraling out they explode into flashes of light and gunpowder.

“HEY!” Nami says, launching to her feet but Bon Clay pulls her back down. Luffy is hit with two in the stomach which send him skidding back, flash burns on his skin. Kuromarimo grins, throwing the bazookas aside and charging. Sticky glove right hits and so does sticky glove left, sending Luffy rocking back and forth and then bone elbow drives his face into the floor.

Shit. She’ll kill him if he loses like this!

“Had enough?” Kuromarimo says, stepping back. “No one defeats Kuromarimo the Great! Trademark of Wapol Toys,” he murmurs at the end. Luffy stands back up, wiping the blood from his mouth. Then he punches either side of his own face. What the hell is he do—

Oh. Oh!

Luffy grins.

“Thanks for the gloves.” And clenching his fists, he pulls the gloves from his face with a hissing pop.

“You can’t do that!” Kuromarimo snaps.

“FURRY GATLING!” Luffy bellows and lets loose a flurry of punches on the guy, going so fast that his arms seem to be a blur. Kuromarimo can only be driven back. He falls, skin lacerated with red marks that Nami can see clearly even from this distance. He reaches for the bazooka.

“Watch out!” Nami cries. Too late. The bazooka goes off right in Luffy’s face, and the afros explode on his face, lifting him off the ground and sending him crashing against the fence on the other side of the arena. He slides down, then wobbles a bit but stands, moving into a boxing stance.

“You’ve asked for it,” Kuromarimo says. “My ultimate weapon! AFRO CHARGE!”

He bends his head like a bull and comes bolting at Luffy. It looks easy to avoid until he presses something on his shoulder and the afro expands to twice its size. Damnit! If Luffy gets stuck in that he’ll never get out! Move! She thinks. Move, you moron!

Kuromarimo is getting closer and closer and finally jumps at Luffy with his head down yelling:

“This match is mine!”

Luffy throws himself forward, sliding under Kuromarimo’s body in a roll and then bouncing to his feet again, hands up in defense… and then dropped as he grins… His opponent…is currently stuck to the fence.

“Damnit!” Kuromarimo snaps, trying to get himself free. Luffy casts the gloves aside, grabs the guys ankles and pulls him horizontal.

“Hey what are you doing?” Kuromarimo growls.

“Winning,” Luffy says.

“I’m not on the ground!”

“Yeah but you’re flat and can’t get out.”

There is silence. Off to one side, Nami can see the referees debating. It’s a fair point a weird way to win but… and then in a quiet low voice from above, Usopp says:

“Luffy.” It sounds almost as if he’s calling him but then he says it again. “Lu-ffy. Lu-ffy.”

And Nami gets it.

“Lu-ffy,” Nami says, then raises her voice. “Lu-ffy! Lu-ffy! Lu-ffy!”

Bon Clay joins her and others and soon it seems like the whole stadium is roaring it at once.

“LU-FFY LU-FFY LU-FFY”

“10!” the referee bellows over the noise and the arena cheers. Kuromarimo struggles.

“9!” they all chant together. “8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1!”

“WINNER: MONKEY D. LUFFY!”

Nami screams, jumping to her feet and throwing her fists into the air. The rest of the arena rises with her, calling out. Bon Clay hugs her and she hugs him back as they jump up and down like little girls. And on the big screen tv, Nami can see Luffy with his arms raised, too, his face burnt and bloody but his smile as fierce as the sunshine. Nami finds herself grinning back, so hard she can barely see. But that doesn’t matter. Nothing matters but that stupid kid and his big stupid grin.