Chapter Eight

[theremedy]

Chapter Eight

Present:

I'll meet you there

Nami couldn’t help but feel ridiculous as she clung to the bar on the crowded bus. The coat Usopp had given her this afternoon was even more bag lady than the one she usually wore, ragged at the hems and patched here and there in different shades of browns. The scarf was too long and oddly colored, Chopper’s, based off of his favorite Doctor series. Though she’d never seen anything like it in E.R. or General Hospital, and she seriously doubted Chopper had ever watched those so it must be some kind of new series. Geeze, Nami was starting to feel old. The hat was big and brown and floppy, lined with fishing flies (which didn’t look a bit like flies) and a ragged feather poking out of scrap of ribbon around the brim where Usopp had gotten carried away. The gloshes were red and over-sized and Nami didn’t ask where Usopp found them and she didn’t want to know. She kind of felt like some dumpy old man heading home for the holidays. As such, she’d drawn the line at the nose glasses. She was tricking Sanji, not playing the villain in some Saturday Morning Cartoon.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket and she pulled it out, or tried, but the thick black gloves were bulky and made it hard to get the damn thing. Finally she yanked the glove off and dug her phone out. Spandam. She should answer it. But what was the point, really? She sent the call to her voice mail anyway and stuffed her glove back on. It wasn’t like she expected Zoro to call so soon. He rarely did anyway, even when he was coming to meet her. In fact, whenever he did call, it was because he’d gotten lost since he’d somehow managed to short circuit every damn GPS they’d ever bought him. She’d never felt so sorry for a mechanical object before. Truth be told she wasn’t looking forward to seeing him in any case. Especially now.

But he wasn’t here and he probably wasn’t going to be here for a while, so Nami shook off the lingering Zoro doom cloud and kept an eye open for her stop. She was going to a place to be treated like the queen of the universe by at least one of the residents and she was damned well going to enjoy it.

Ah. There it was. Nami pulled the nylon cord for the bus to stop and bundled off it, into the biting cold evening. It was clear, though and the stars were strung across the night sky next to a hard quarter moon that looked more like a scythe then a smile. You’re here to have fun, Nami told herself firmly. Remember that. She began to trudge up the hill and was halfway there when she remembered. Sighing she pulled off her glove again, cursing such delicate and feminine hands that made this deception so necessary, and pressed number three on her speed dial.

“Yello?” Usopp says.

“Yello? Seriously?” Nami says.”I thought we were out of the ‘90s.”

“Oh, Charlie! Glad you could make it!” Usopp said brightly. Already her hand was growing cold.

“I’m halfway up the hill, Usopp.”

“Wow I can’t believe you walked all the way from Peter’s Street. You’re tough, my man. Hey remember that time when—”

She hung up on him. He could talk to himself if he wanted but it was cold out here. She shoved her hand back into her stupid glove and continued her tromp up the hill. Zeff and Sanji lived in a small townhouse overlooking Lake Union. She stopped for a moment to admire the lights on the sailboats bobbing in the water and strung across the bridge. Her breath frosting in the air. She imagined what camera she’d use, what filters, to capture the light and the quiet business of a winter’s night. She closed her eyes and imagined setting it all up, fingers blistering with cold and hearing the boys messing around behind her, being annoying as usual while Robin stood off to the side with a cup of steaming coffee that Sanji served her. Maybe Brook was playing something sweet but brittle and maybe Vivi was there, standing beside Nami and smiling when Nami whipped around to tell the dumbasses to shut up because she was trying to focus here.

But there was none of that. The only sounds were cars rushing by on the busy road below and the sound of a dog barking somewhere in the lonely distance. Silent night indeed. Ah well. Nami flipped the scarf to cover her nose,made sure her hair was tucked away and popped on the sunglasses. That made things a bit difficult as she tried to manage the concrete steps, nearly falling. These guys better damn well appreciate the sacrifices she went through. Finally she’d made it to the top without falling and knocked.

The door opened and a ghost of warm air like a breath washed over the bridge of her nose as Usopp stood, silhouetted in the warm light.

“Charlie!” he said, brightly, putting a hand on her shoulder to guide her in. “Wow I’m glad you made it!”

“Hi Charlie,” said Chopper from the couch, biting his lips to keep from smiling. Sanji, fortunately, didn’t see it as he stood behind Chopper in the archway to the kitchen, hip cocked to the side as he stirred something, a cigarette hanging from his lips.

“Welcome to the shitty house,” Sanji said. “Dinner’s in half an hour, but you can take off your coat whenever you want.”

“Don’t mind if I do,” Nami said, throwing off her coat to reveal her tight fitting Hard Candy t-shirt, a marginally less skin tight pair of blue jeans and…well still the red galoshes but the overall effect was the same. The cigarette dropped into the bowl.

“Shit!” Sanji said, and sending Usopp and Chopper howling with laughter. Nami laughed too and took off the rest of her costume, grinning at Sanji and giving him a wink.

“Thanks for the shitty welcome, Sanji-kun.”

“Nami— The shitty— Usopp, I’m going to kill you!” The bowl was spun onto an end table and Usopp yelped, bolting as Sanji chased him around the couch. Chopper watched them laughing until Usopp dove behind him.

“Oi! Don’t hide behind me!”

“It was your idea!”

“Not all my idea! You suggested it!”

“But you bought the hat!” They pushed at each other until Sanji popped them both over the head with one long leg. Then he pivoted gracefully enough to make Bon Clay cry and dipped into an elegant bow from the waist, sweeping a hand outward.

“My lady, welcome to our humble abode.”

“It’s good to be here,” Nami said, eyeing what looked to be a girlie mag on the floor before Sanji swept it under the couch with a swift kick. Usopp and Chopper began snickering until Sanji gave them a sharp look.

“Go and set the table, you assholes!” And then back to Nami with a sweet smile, fluffing the pillow on an arm chair before gesturing to it. “A seat, my fair maiden?”

“Of course,” Nami said, stepping out of the ridiculous galoshes and padding sockfooted over to the arm chair, then putting them up on the ottoman Sanji offered. She held out her hand, smiling to herself as Sanji fitted a wine glass into it and then velvety red wine into it, looking every inch a waiter. Ahh this was the life.

“Anything else I can offer you? Chocolate? An intimate massage?”

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” Nami said, flapping a hand and trying her damnedest not to think about intimate massages. “Go do your thing.”

“As you wish,” he said, and fluttered his way back to the kitchen, yelling at them not to put out the shitty plates. Didn’t they see that Nami was here? She was always surprised he didn’t get whiplash when he did that. Still she found it was kind of lonely, sitting here sipping wine alone. The others should be here.

Even if Zoro were here he’d just be sprawled on the couch, steadfastly refusing to help as he downed his beer until Sanji roused him into a fight and they crashed their way into her nerves. If Luffy were here there would be even more crashing and him using the couch as his own personal jungle gym and being kicked out of the kitchen repeatedly until Nami wanted to sit on him to keep him still. It was a fine line between loving someone and wanting to kick their head in and Nami was usually on both sides. She sighed and spotted Chopper carrying a small stack of dishes from the kitchen.

“Put those down and sit with me,” Nami said.

“Oh sure!” Chopper said brightly. Then glanced uncertainly at Sanji who was just coming out of the dining room. “But um…”

“Do as the lady says, Chopper.” He waved a hand and continued toward the kitchen. “Usopp can finish setting the table.”

“Oi! Why me?” Usopp said from the kitchen.

“Because I said so, shithead,” Sanji said. “You wanna eat, you gotta work.”

“Yeah yeah. By the way, how is that cake batter coming?” A pause and then. “Don’t do it I’m holding a good plate. I’m holding a good plate!” There was a solid thock. “OW! One of these days you’re going to give me a concussion, you know.”

“One of these days you’re going to deserve it.”

Nami rolled her eyes and shot a smile at Chopper as he flopped on the floor beside her. He looked good and had definitely changed from the ten-year-old furball he’d once been. For one thing it was frankly obvious he worked out, though he’d never been much of a fighter. He’d learned what to do with his facial hair, too, keeping long sideburns that phased into a tight beard over his jaw.

“I see you’re growing your hair out,” she said, flipping his ponytail.

“Oh that’s just left over from Halloween. I’ve been too busy to cut it.”

“Want me to do it?” Nami asked, since that seemed to be a trend this year.

“I dunno I might wanna keep it.” Chopper reached back and fingered the ponytail thoughtfully. “Usopp says it makes me look dashing.”

Oh lord. He was already at that age where he wanted to look dashing. Where had the time gone?

“He may be right.” Nami sipped her wine, and then leaned forward, smirking and pressing a finger against his cheek. “Anyone in particular you want to look dashing for?”

Chopper flushed and out of the corner of her eye, Nami could see Usopp and Sanji peering out of the kitchen archway, waiting for an answer. They were all gossip mongers, she swore.

“Is it a lady?” Sanji asked with a grin.

“Is it a textbook?” Usopp asked and Sanji swatted him with the dishtowel.

“No one said you could stop working, longnose. Get moving.”

“Ass,” Usopp muttered.

“Elephant turd,” Sanji said back. Nami tuned them out and looked at Chopper who was rubbing the back of his neck.

“I dunno, I just like to look dashing, I guess. It really fits in with steam punk.”

Whatever that was. Now what to talk about? She was tempted to ask him about school since she was mildly curious— but he tended to not know how to stop talking and she’d had her fill of sickness without hearing about communicable diseases in Bolivia. Chopper picked at the carpet. Nami swirled the wine in her glass. Well he read didn’t he? Maybe they’d read the same book at some point. Though…god, when’s the last time she sat down with a book. Did he watch hockey? She couldn’t remember but it was sort of a moot point since she hadn’t followed any of it for a long time now.

“Oh!” Chopper said. “I made that photo album like you asked me to. Wanna see it?”

“Sure,” Nami said, faintly surprised. She’d said to do it just as a thing, not expecting him to actually take pictures. He hurried to his suitcase, parked in one of the shadowy corners of the room and Nami moved to the couch so it would be easier. As she waited she glanced at the pictures on the far wall. Not many of them but they roughly traced Sanji’s childhood from a certain age, two pictures only distinguishable from one another by the way his hair was parted. One of these days she was going to see both those crazy eyebrows at the same time.

Chopper sat down beside her, the photo album in his lap and she was surprised again. She’d expected some kind of cheap plastic binder but it was more like a scrapbook than anything, hand sewn together with red thread and a group shot on the cover of…well a long time ago. Chopper traced the cover with his fingertips.

“They’re not very good…” he mumbled and Nami shrugged.

“It’s the thought that counts.” And she meant it. Even if the pictures were off kilter or the person had glowing red eyes, as long as you could see who it was, there was memory there. Even more so if you could see the place. Not every picture was going to be a masterpiece and sometimes even crappy ones held more sentiment then the best photographer could produce.

Chopper nodded and opened the book, revealing it really was a scrapbook. There were pictures but also cards and ticket stubs—each page meticulously decorated though she couldn’t pick out any sort of theme. Then again, scrapbooks had never really been her thing. She watched Chopper’s year unfold, listening to what he said and greedily trying to find the hints of Usopp. She could see his influence here and there and there was rarely a page without him being in one picture or another. For the most part she let Chopper keep his own pace until they came to Halloween and she gently took the book from him so she could look at the plethora of Usopp and, surprisingly, Robin. They were dressed from Beauty and the Beast with Chopper as the Beast, Usopp as Gaston, and Robin looking stunning in a really cheap yellow Belle dress. Then again, Robin could look stunning in a paper bag.

“I didn’t know she was up there,” Nami said.

“We didn’t know she was coming. Usopp just woke up and found her in his living room.”

“That’s Robin for you,” Nami said dryly. “Franky, too. What is it with them and breaking and entering anyway?”

“Dunno. Maybe they just like to be welcomed no matter what.”

“Maybe they’re freaks,” Nami said, which was the more accurate answer, but she loved them anyway.

“What did you do for Halloween?”

Got piss drunk and wished she were dead as another month came to a close and December loomed on the horizon.

“Oh not much. I don’t do holidays anymore.”

Chopper was silent a moment and Nami flipped the pages but there were fewer and fewer pictures. She supposed that was when test time had happened. Chopper meshed his fingers together and she knew what was coming before he spoke.

“I…she told me about…you know… What we’re going to do.”

“Did she?” Nami said, not wanting to think about it and wishing it didn’t always come back to this. Couldn’t she have a single hour without this hanging over her head?

“I mean as a med student I understand, but—”

“Good.” Nami shut the book. “I’m glad you understand. Anyway, I’m going to help set the table. Great scrapbook.”

“Oh…thanks,” Chopper said, softly gathering the book to his chest. Nami stood. She liked the kid. She loved him. She did. But someone else could field this one because she was tired of being the adult.

----

“Eat shit and die!” Nami snarled, wrenching her car over to slam into the other one, the controller vibrating in her hands.

“Ah! Nami! Stop!” Chopper cried. “I’m going to off !! the…cliff…”

“Nami’s so cute when she’s being an aggressive driver,” Sanji said, wiggling his hips against the couch.

“Aggressive? Try homicidal,” Usopp said from where he was sitting on the floor by her legs. He twisted his head to look up at her. “You know this is supposed to be a racing game, right?”

“I know I gotta blue shell with yer name on it,” Nami said.

“Oh shit,” Usopp said. Nami fired it off just as Usopp applied the breaks on his Yoshi buggy. Causing Sanji to shoot ahead, the blue shell hurtling after him.

“Asshole! That shitty shell was yours!” Sanji snapped as his princess mobile went flying. Bye bye princesses. “My poor ladies.”

“All’s fair in love and war,” Usopp said, then powered ahead. “Bye.”

“Usopp! I’m going to get you back for that!”

“Eat my pixellated dust.”

Nami guided her big ugly turtle guy and the little monkey guy back and forth with one finger as she chugged the bottle of chocolate liquor and set it down, nearly missing the coffee table. Someone musta moved it. She was still kinda thirsty though.

“Is there any more, Sanji?” she asked, leaning her head on the cook’s shoulder, partly to distract him as she charged her way ahead, shooting a banana at Chopper who spun out of control and cliffing Usopp on her way to victory.

“Ah, chocolate liquor? I think that’s the last of it,” Sanji said and Nami could see his color rise. He wasn’t foolin’ no one. Fool.

“What else you got?”

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough for now?” Chopper asked, giving her a frown. Humph. She scowerd…scowled at him.

“Can it, ponytail. I only had four bottles and they were small. ‘Sides.” She patted her belly. “Cast iron stomach.”

“You’ve had six, Nami,” Sanji said softly. “Plus the wine you had for dinner.”

“Whatever, I’m still kicking you wusses asses. Hey Chopper. Cliff!”

“What? Ahh!”

“Alls fair in love’n’stuff.” She reached for the chocolate liquor. It was empty. All right which asshole drank it? She hiccuped and tasted it in her mouth and realized it with a giggle. Oh right. Her.

“I wanna little more, Sanji-kuuun,” she said, letting her car drive itself as she wrapped both her arms around one of his, pressing up against it and taking a deep breath, watching his adams apple bob. She smiled up at him and rubbed her chin against his shoulder.

“Please?” she said in a soft voice.

“Oops,” Usopp said, doing something with his foot and making the game switch off.

“Hey! I was playing that!” Nami snapped, kicking at his shoulder.

“Sorry but ah, it’s pretty late. We should go to bed.”

“Yeah, good idea,” Chopper said giving her a sideways glance. Nami reached over and pulled at his cheek.

“Don’t see I don’t think what yer doin’,” she said, lifting her head. “I mean…that other thing.”

“Umm I really don’t understand?” Chopper said, sounding nervous Nami patted his cheek.

“Go back to school, pollywog.”

“Padawan,” Usopp said.

“Whatever.” She leaned back against Sanji, wrapping his arm around her waist and looking at his fingernails. Why were they so glossy? It was weird. Freeaaaakuh.

“Anyway I can’t go home ‘cuz I have a funny smelling coat and those goshes are weird.” She shifted to rest her head on Sanji’s shoulder again, pulling his hand up a little further just to watch him blush. Oh man he was so easy. Soo easy. Like those lil’ oven things were you were s’pposed to be able to make a pie. “You wouldn’ make me go out there in that, would you?” she said, giving him a look.

“Uh,” he squeaked, then cleared his throat. “Of course you’re welcome to stay here,” Sanji said. “You can use the guest bed.”

“I want your bed,” Nami said, arching her back up against him.

“O-of course!”

“With you in it.”

Sanji made a strangled noise.

“O-kay,” Usopp said and Nami found herself being pulled to her feet by the long nosed…annoying guy. “I think that’s enough psychological torture for one night.”

“I don’t want you,” Nami said, pushing against his shoulders. “You snore.”

“The feeling is mutual,” Usopp said. “Tell you what, I’ll pay you twenty dollars if you come upstairs and lie down for an hour.”

“I don’ gotta sleep, do I?” Nami said, pouting at him.

“Not if you don’t want to.”

Okay. That sounded…like a pretty good deal. She’d lay down and get her money and then…maybe go out and blow it on some Grey Goose. Why not? Not like there was much to save money for. Oh wait! She had to…

“Gotta get my phone,” she said, twisting out of Usopp’s grip and stumbling over the uneven tilt of the floor to riffle through the big coat. “Zoro might call and wanna know where to go from Bolivia. Bolivia!” She pressed the phone against her chest and explained to them carefully. “That’s nowhere near Colorado! How does he even get down there without a passport?”

“Why would Zoro be going to Colorado?” Chopper asked.

“Cuz of that Eme…Emelem guy.”

“Eminem?” Usopp asked.

“No the other one.”

They looked at her blankly and she sighed, flopping her hands down against her thighs.

“This is why I can’t tell you jerks anything!” She was about to tell them off for it when keys rattled and the front door opened to reveal a Zeff. Oh, hey Zeff. She peered at him.

“How do you get your mustache to stay up like that?” she asked. His eyebrows climbed up into his hat and Nami pfft out a laugh.

“Did you see that?” she said to Usopp who came up and wrapped a hand around her waist.

“Hilarious. Welcome back, Pops.”

“Usopp he’s not your Pops,” Nami said, pushing at his shoulder again as he lead her away. “Your Pops is in New York.”

“Oh yeah I forgot.”

“Silly, Usoso.” It was pretty hard to get up the stairs because Usopp kept tripping her. Jerk. She sat on the bed and then lay down. An hour, huh? She could handle it.He flipped the blanket over her and she pulled it up to her shoulder. Silly silly Usoso. Always taking care of her.

“You’re a good guy, you know.”

“Thanks. You too.” Even though he was quiet, though, she could still hear him breathing, hovering just beside the bed. She twisted around to look up at him but it was too dark to see his expression.

“Hmm?”

“Ah…nothing. Sleep well, Nami.”

“You, too.” She murmured. Her phone glowed and she peered at it blearily. Then pressed two on the speed dial. The phone rang once. Twice. Three times. Five times. Answer it, stupid.

“Yo!”

“Yo,” Nami replied in a low voice. And then heard her past self say something muffled.

“Oh right. Umm. I’m Monkey D. Luffy but I’m not here and I really don’t like phones anyway so if you wanna call me just call someone else. But if you really wanna talk to me you should just come say hi.”

“I really wanna come see you,” Nami said after the beep. “But you’re never home.” There was a long silence and the voice mail beeped again. End of message. Nami hung up, blinked slowly and held down two again. Listening to it ring and ring and ring to an empty room back in her apartment.

“Yo!”


Past:

Lookin' for somethin' I've never seen

Chinese food is everywhere, spread over the table and half gone. There are green bottles of booze, too, that between her and Zoro have been completely devastated. Even Usopp has had had a glass or two and is now dark cheeked as he stands on the chair, holding Nami’s brush like a microphone.

“And here he comes, ladies and gentleman,” Usopp says, making shhing noises to imitate the crowd. Nami grins around the bottle and shakes her head. “The one… The only… MONKEY Monkey monkey D D d LuFFYYYYYYY!”

Luffy came from behind the chair, frowning fiercely, the effect somewhat marred by the peanut sauce stain on his King Chicken shirt. He folds his arms and glowers at Nami.

“I am the future Pirate King of the World.” And he grins. “And I’m going to kick your ass.”

“Oh no!” Nami says.

“And the crowd goes wild! Haaah! Haah! Woo! Marry me, Luffy!” Usopp says. Someone had said that which is the thing. It had only been because they hadn’t known him.

“Come on!” Luffy shifts into a fighting stance, fists cocked. “Let’s go.”

Nami applauded around the bottle. Usopp leaned down in a dramatic pose resting a forearm on Luffy’s shoulder.

“And of course as heir to the throne of the pirate king of the world, if you fight well I’ll be more then happy to take you on in my captain’s stead.”

“No way,” Luffy says. “Get your own fights.”

“Oi, oi stop moving away I’m still—” Usopp yelps and flails, managing to save himself before faceplanting into the carpet. “Damnit, Luffy, you could have killed me!”

“Sorry, sorry,” Luffy says, poking his nose into the empty boxes. “Foood. I need food,” he sang to himself.

“As if you didn’t eat enough already,” Nami says. She’d never met someone so hungry! It’s even worse now that he’s started fighting. The boy can blow through sixty dollars worth of Chinese food and his stomach still grumbles. Not that sixty dollars is that much of a big deal these days. It’s only been three arenas in as many weeks and Luffy’s popularity only seems to grow. People are starting to come in from out of state to watch him fight and for the mid-sized arenas they’d been in, that’s a pretty big deal.

“You sound sorry,” Usopp mutters, flopping cross legged beside Nami and snatching a box of sweet and sour chicken from Luffy’s grip.

“Hey!” Luffy says, slamming his hand on the table. “That’s mine!”

“It is not yours! You went through two boxes all on your own!” Usopp says, holding the carton to his chest. “Don’t be selfish!”

“Here, Luffy, you can have the rest of my lo mein,” Nami says, sliding it across the table. Luffy frowned into the box.

“What’s in it?”

“Pork I think,” Nami says.

“Thank youuu,” Luffy says, flopping down and digging in with Zoro’s left over chopsticks. Nami puts on her new reading glasses and opens her budget book just to stare at the numbers. 5 grand. Ahhh. She wants to rub her cheek against it like a happy cat. Granted they’re going to be dry for a few weeks or so until the next arena opens up and with that and several other expenses, that 5 grand is going to deflate considerably, but the point was that it’s still so much from only three events and it would only grow along with Luffy’s reputation. It is strange, too, since unlike Zoro, Luffy’s not a consistent win. Some fights he loses, and badly. But whether he wins or loses, he always seems to inspire people to scream for him.

Nami glances over the book and sees him with his mouth full of noodles, face smeared with sauce, and reminds herself never to let him eat in public until his reputation is more secure.

“Foo foof fife, Fuffop,” Luffy says and Nami holds up the book as a shield to protect from soggy projectiles.

“Don’t talk and eat!” Nami snaps, flicking some well chewed carrots from the book before whacking him on the head with it.

“Fowrry.”

He swallows and burps before saying:

“You should fight, Usopp.”

“What me? I would but it just wouldn’t be fair,” Usopp says, putting a hand to the center of his chest. “After all, these mid sized fighters can’t hold a candle to me and even if they could— I promised my great uncle on his death bed that I would never fight in an arena unless I could be a sniper.”


“So if you ever got that opportunity, you’d be obligated to do it?” Nami says resting her chin on the heel of her hand and giving Usopp as smirk.

“Of course! I am a man of honor!” Usopp says. Oh, unsuspecting lamb.

“Well melee is all kinds of weapons,” Luffy says, giving her unexpected innocent support and the flush flees from Usopp’s cheeks. “So you could probably do it no problem!”

“Ah—well that is to say, it has to be an official sniper tournament,” Usopp says, flapping a hand.
“You know, because he wanted me to be King of the Snipers and I’m not going to get that title in an arena.” He laughs.

“Let’s see your skills then,” Nami says. “If you have them.”

“Oh, lady, you’re on,” Usopp says. “I may be many things but I can hit the eye of a clay pigeon at fifty yards.”

“I wanna see you do that!” Luffy says, pumping his fist into the air. “Let’s go!”

“It’s pitch black outside, you’d never be able to see it,” Usopp says, but he jabs imperiously with his chopsticks. “Go stand by the door, and I’ll shoot some chicken into your mouth.”

“Okay!” Luffy scrambles up, nearly knocking over the table and Nami saves her drink from spilling just in time. Geeze, he’s so careless. She expects Usopp to shoot from the table, move closer even, so she’s surprised when he grabs a piece of chicken and moves to the other side of the room, digging a slingshot from his backpack. Eating anything shot from that cannot be sanitary but Nami’s not particularly worried about it. It is Luffy after all.

“Okay, watch the great sniper at work. Luffy! Open wide!”

“Ahhhh!”

Usopp fits the chicken into the cradle of the slingshot, pulls back and then snap! Nami can follow it only well enough to see it in Luffy’s mouth right before his teeth close over it. She’s suitably impressed.

“That’s pretty nice, Usopp,” she says.

“Thank you, thank you. I would have gone from an even greater distance but I didn’t want to kill him.”

“Nn,” Luffy says, or something like it.

“Maybe you really should go in a tournament,” Nami says with a grin. “After all, even sniper kings need to start somewhere.”

Usopp gives her a horrified look as he resumes his seat beside her.

“Are you trying to kill me? I want to live til I’m old enough to drink…legally,” he adds. Nami grins and salutes him with her bottle before drinking.

“NNN!” Luffy says. Nami looks at him idly. He’s watching them, eyes wide and flailing. Nami wonders if he’s trying to fly or do some weird sort of chicken dance-—when she realizes abruptly that he’s choking.

Crap.

“Luffy!” Usopp says, jolting to his feet. The door opens behind Luffy to reveal Zoro, carrying a bucket of mostly melted ice. He blinks mildly at his ‘captain’, sighs and sets the bucket down before yanking the boy to him, sliding into a Heimlich maneuver so smooth it takes her a moment to even realize that he’s doing it. The bit of chicken flies out and lands soggily on the carpet.

“Chew your damn food,” Zoro says, shoving him in the back of the head before picking up the ice bucket and nudging the door closed with his foot.

“I tried but it was too fast,” Luffy says with a pout. Zoro gives him a look.

“Have you been drinking?”

“Ah, no I shot it into his mouth,” Usopp says. “Sorry about that.”

“Oh.” Zoro sits at the table, sets the ice bucket down,and then his eyes bulge. “Oi! You ate it all!?”

“We sent you for ice half an hour ago,” Nami says, wondering what she’d been thinking. Oh. Right.
She’d been thinking even an idiot like Zoro can’t get lost in a hotel.

“I couldn’t find any ice machines so I had to go to the Best Western.”

“That’s down the street!” Nami snaps.

“I know where it is, that’s why I went there,” Zoro says as if he has every right to be irritated. Nope. Not going to fight this battle. She sighs. Lets. It. Go. And waves an idle hand toward the mini-fridge.

“We saved your portion in there.”

Luffy and Zoro’s gazes lock on the fridge at the same time. Luffy is fast but Zoro is faster, punching Luffy in the head and then sitting on him before opening the fridge.

“Ahh! Zoro get off!” Luffy howls, reaching for the boxes of food.

“Like hell I’m getting off. I want to eat.”

Luffy continues whining and wriggling like a worm as Zoro puts his food in the microwave that rests on top of the fridge, shutting the fridge door and folding his arms each time as he waits for the timer to ding. More than twice he almost closes the door on Luffy’s fingers.

“You’re a terrible person,” Luffy says, resting his face on the carpet. “Such a food hog.”

“Oi, I don’t want to hear that from you!”

“Food hog! Food hog!” Luffy says. “Stingy!”

Zoro pops him on the back of the head. Luffy wrenches around and pulls at his face. Nami watches them struggle for a moment before turning back to her budget book.

“You know, Zoro,” Usopp says. “There’s an ice machine just around the corner.”

“You think I care about that now?!” Zoro snaps as Luffy pulls on both sides of his mouth before yelping when Zoro grabs his nose. The phone rings. Nami blinks at it, then meanders over, sitting on her bed and grabbing a pen before picking up the phone and tucking it between her neck and shoulder.

“Hello?” she says, knowing better than to give any more information then that. There is a moment of serrated breathing and she almost thinks its a stalker and hangs up with a voice curls into her ear like a slime trail.

“Where are you?”

Arlong. A cold chill cracks in the base of her spine. She straightens. She’s not afraid of him. She’s not. He can do nothing to her now. He wouldn’t anyway. Not when they are both after the same thing that he needs more than she does.

“None of your business,” she says, as mildly as she can, watching the fight continue until Usopp asks for Luffy’s help in catching a Raticate. Arlong gives a weak breathy laugh which dissolves into coughing that sounds like glass is being rubbed over his lungs. Nami relishes in it.

“It’s all your business, Nami,” Arlong says and she hates the grin she can hear in his voice. “It’s about the cure.”

“What about it?” Nami turns away so that they can’t read her expression. Her hand is trembling lightly and she forces it to still.

“You’ll have to meet me and find out.”

“Where?”

“The overflow parking lot at Crystal Caverns. Next Monday. Midnight.”

A bolt of chill through her. How did he know where they were? But of course he did, she reminds herself. He follows the circuits even if he can’t go. That’s his business. She wonders who he’s using as a bookie this time and wishes she could hate him more for that. But she hates him plenty enough for everything else so she’ll have to be satisfied.

“Fine.”

He hangs up before she can and she listens to the dial tone a moment before setting the phone down. It’s dangerous. Meeting Arlong is always dangerous and she hates to do it. He’s much weaker than he used to be but that’s like a downgrade from a Monster Truck to a Mac Truck. She half thinks of bringing Luffy and the others with her. At least Zoro who can probably take Arlong on. Probably. But not the rest of them which Arlong will inevitably have with them. She doesn’t want him killed and she doesn’t want his life or any of their lives hung over her head. Not again.

“Nami?” Luffy says and she sees them all looking at her, Usopp with mild curiosity, Zoro with his damn inscrutable expression and Luffy seems…concerned.

“Oh just Valentine being a bitch as usual. How’d she even get this number?”

“She probably asked the hotel,” Usopp says, leaning back against the wall as he returns to his game. Luffy and Zoro are still watching her and she wants to crack their heads together. Well there is one way to get away from them.

“Anyway, I’m going to take a shower,” Nami says, then fixes a pointed glare at Luffy. “So if you have to go, go now.”

“I’m fine,” he says. Zoro turns back to monitoring his food but she can feel Luffy’s eyes on her all the way to the bathroom.

---

It’s about two in the morning when the cab finally drops her off about half a mile from the parking lot of the Crystal Caverns. The cab driver looks at her like she’s nuts as she climbs out into the chilly cloudy night, but Nami ignores him, closes the door and waits until he speeds off before heading up the road. It was harder to sneak away than she’d thought it would be, even with lacing their drinks with sleeping pills. Zoro had figured it out right before he’d dropped off, but let him. It isn’t as if he can find her.

But it’s fine. It’s all fine. Once she finds out about the cure, provided the asshole isn’t lying— which she’s going to be on the lookout for this time— well she’ll still need the money for it, won’t she? 5 grand won’t begin to cover it. So she can go back and lie like the dickens and if nothing else Luffy and Usopp will believe her. If Zoro doesn’t, that’s his problem but then all she has to do is to hope he puts up with her at least until the next tournament when she can find some new clients. True, she was still a new manager, but Luffy’s sudden reputation should at least be good for one gig or two. And even if it isn’t, she’s always been a respectable bookie.

She hears the thrum of a motorcycle down the road and curses to herself. Who the hell is out here at this time of night? Nami scrambles for the shelter of some low lying scrub brush, the light flooding around a second before she’s able to press herself flat against the ground. She bites her lip and clenches her fingers in the rocky dirt as she hears the motorcycle slow, stop. Shit! Go away! She snarls at them mentally. She doesn’t need any more trouble. Nor does she need questions or heroes, reluctant or otherwise.

“What is it?” says a young man, sounding sleepy. “Why did we stop?”

“Thought I saw someone,” says an older man, voice gruff. No, you didn’t! Nami thinks at them desperately. Go away!

“You sure it wasn’t a shitty fox or something? I’ve seen two already.” Quiet except for the idling of the engine. A beetle is walking out of the sage brush right by her hand and Nami presses her lips together.

“Yeah, you might be right,” says the man, revving the engine. “Don’t fall asleep back there, kid. We’ve still got a few miles to go.” The kid’s reply is lost to the motorcycle roaring off and Nami breathes out, flicking the beetle away and waiting until the sounds die out to get up and continue on her way, a little quicker this time.

She reaches the overflow parking lot without incident, hanging back in the shadow of a stunted twisty tree. The moon has come out from behind the clouds and is casting silvery light into the otherwise dark parking lot. Three vans sit in a rough semi-circle, pointing at the group of…of monsters sitting a few feet away by a fire lit in a trashcan.

Fishmen.

Her childhood had been poverty stricken and sometimes miserable, but it was nothing compared to what had happened when they’d come bubbling up out of the bay, dripping seaweed. Monsters, everyone had thought, and they had been right. With Arlong in the lead they’d thoroughly trashed the town, burned down what they didn’t loot, including homes. Orange Grove had been a small rural community, sandwiched between swamp and small sheltered bay, but they’d expected help. Nami couldn’t count the times she’d prayed for a SWAT team or the FBI or even Mully and Sculder to come and solve their problem. For whatever reason they had been abandoned by everyone except a small group of weird scientists who’d been captured the moment they’d set foot in town.

Their only contribution had been to create some kind of neurotoxin, Nami knew to call it that now, that Arlong dumped into the town water supply. Many died, some lived but were decaying slowly, aging at a much faster rate than they should. Through pure accident or luck or kismet, Nami had managed to get her hands on the last barrel of the stuff. She’s still not sure how that had happened. She considered herself as a resourceful person, but she hadn’t known anything when she was eight. All she’d known was that her town was dying and she didn’t want it to die any more, so she’d dumped it into the bay.

There had been…more Fishmen down there. A small colony. Fish and Fishmen died alike, corpses washing up on the beach. Nami remembered crying for days when she’d seen a mermaid, prettier than anyone she’d ever seen and dead. Nami can still remember her face, still and perfect.

That seemed to be the straw that broke the government’s back because they’d sent people in, then. But before the SWAT and FBI arrived, helicopters blotted dark against the blue sky, Arlong had made Bellemere drink the bay water straight down. Everyone thought she would die. Nami sometimes wishes she had. She’d been a vegetable for years now. Brain dead, the doctors said. Not there. Left the building.
No one had blamed her, not even Nojiko, even though they should. The town even scraped together money to keep her in the hospital. A living saint. Snow White waiting for a kiss that would never come.
And meanwhile, the town continued dying. No one knew when and if the disease would strike. Sometimes it would even skip a generation and a healthy mother would have a baby that would only live a few short days. Nothing to be done, the government had said. You have our sympathies. She didn’t want their sympathies, she’d wanted their money, she’d wanted a cure.

When she was thirteen, Arlong had come back into her life as suddenly as before, ricketed with the
disease himself and Nami had never been so acidically happy to see it. He’d found someone willing to work on the cure, he’d said. One of the scientists they’d captured who went by ‘Ceaser’. All he’d needed was the funding and Arlong knew a good fast way to get it—only he couldn’t go himself. Fishmen were strong but panicked people with shotguns were stronger.

When she was fifteen, she’d found out he’d lied. Ceaser was a real guy, Nami had met him once, but the money had been going toward other things. Nami had never found out what it was and never cared. She’d ditched him and made her own way. And made her own way quite well. Until she’d been persuaded to try and manage some in Foxy’s stable, until she’d gotten suspicious about things he’d been doing, until she’d gotten caught.

Still— she is still going forward now, and she takes the opportunity to gloat about it silently as she glares at the Fishman in the center of the circle, his hair a shock of white now, his webbed hand like a bone over the piece of driftwood he’s using as a cane.

Nami lifts her head, throws back her shoulders and approaches the Fishmen who look up to watch her come. There are fewer with him than there used to be. Hachi, still and she’s, very reluctantly, sort of relieved to see that he was still alive. Compared to the rest, he wasn’t as bad. Compared to the rest she almost didn’t hate him.

Arlong rose as she came closer, dark and monstrous, his dorsal cutting against the moon before he straightened to his full height and looked down his jagged nose at her. One eye had gone dead, she noticed, a thick film covering it. Good.

“You’d better not be wasting my time, Arlong,” she told him, looking right into his good eye. It’s reckless, she knows, as all she has is a small knife, tucked into a garter at her thigh—her staff burned up along with everything else. It—hadn’t seemed important to get a new one but now she regrets not doing it.

“You always did have a mouth on you,” he says with a grin to show off his jagged teeth. “Just like your mother.” He reaches for her as if to grab her chin but she steps back. She won’t let that hurt. She refuses to let that hurt. He snickers and sits down, one leg giving out but Kuroobi grabs his elbow and helps him the rest of the way.

“What do you want?” she says, glowering at him.”What about the cure?”

“There is no cure, you moron,” Arlong says, a smirk tugging one corner of his mouth. Right. She should have expected something like this. He’s obviously planning something else and she’s not going to have any part in it.

“Go to hell,” she tells him, then pivots, feeling the dagger’s presence against her leg, knowing she has one hit.

“What do you think I used the money for anyway, Nami?” he calls after her. “Do you see us living it up? Living the high life? I can’t get out of the car without risking getting shot at.”

“Too bad they have lousy aim,” Nami calls back, not looking, not stopping.

“He’s lying,” Arlong says. “If he had a cure, why isn’t he getting government funding? Think, idiot. There’s more avenues to money then a Fishman and a little girl can get.”

That…is true. He’s always been smart about money. Too smart about money. She pauses, and slowly turns, folding her arms across her chest.

“What did you use the money for?” she asks. He watches her a long moment, good eye shadowed in the brim of his black hat.

“Ransom,” he says finally. “That bastard has my sister.”

Shock jolts through her. She’s only met Arlong’s sister once. Only seen her once before she’d even known who the mermaid was related to. Nami had first seen her as a little mermaid toddler, sitting on the beach, playing with shells. Nami had wanted to hate her. Had tried so hard to hate her. But couldn’t even manage it when Arlong had swept the mermaid up, carrying her with one arm into the water. Nami remembered watching them until her face disappeared in the small waves.

But…she’s not stupid. She’s not going to fall for such an obvious bit for sympathy.

“If that’s true why didn’t you tell me from the start?”

“Sure,” he sneers. “As if you’d help a mermaid.”

“What makes you think I’d help her now?” Nami says, hating to sound so callous, wondering what Luffy would think— Well who cares what he would think? She’s trying to save her own people. Why should she care about the monsters that had destroyed her people’s lives to begin with? Maybe some of them had been innocent, but no one in Orange Grove had done anything to deserve what had happened to them.

Arlong raises a hand, gesturing to Hachi. The octopus Fishman gives her a small smile which Nami doesn’t return and carefully approaches her, holding out a photograph. Nami takes it, turning to catch the moonlight, and the bottom drops out of her stomach. Joker’s lab…and through a window, Nami can see Nojiko, tied to a chair, head bowed, their secret tatto plainly visible on her shoulders.

“Why?” Nami finds herself whispering.

“I don’t know and I don’t care,” Arlong says. “I want to see Sharley free before I die and now that we have mutual interests…” He shrugs. “Come with us,” he says. “Bring your friends.”

“I’ll let you take me to the airport,” Nami says. She isn’t getting them involved in this. She can’t. She imagines Luffy will have no problems helping, but as good as he is in the arena, it’s much different from the real world when people are ready to kill you. Not to mention Usopp will be terrified and Zoro…who knows what he’d think. Who cares what he’d think? She’s not going to do it.

“What are you going to do by yourself?” Arlong asks, his lips raised in an almost sneer. Nami has no idea.

“That’s none of your business,” she says. She’ll figure it out as she goes along.